Daily Life

Learning to just ‘be’

July 7, 2014

I had a flex day today and I had great ambitions. To sort my tax, meet my girlfriends for breakfast,  go for a run, pitch an article, bake a cake, sort out the paperwork drawer.

I am not very good at switching off.

After breakfast I found myself doing none of these things. I am snuggled up on the couch with a blanket. YES and Cat. YES. Sorting my emails. Snoozing. And reading a book about marriage. (When I am finished it will be  awesome material for another post). I have mustered up the energy to have a pedicure, and if it so happens I might go for a recovery run later. (But I think I will probably just bake a cake instead.)

I think after 30 + years of life, I am finally learning that doing nothing for a day is okay. GOOD for you in fact.

We all need to do nothing every once in a while.

There are a couple of things I have enlisted to stop feeling so ‘busy’ all the time in mind and body.

1. I have taken Facebook and email OFF my phone.

Before I sound amazing and insightful, this was NOT instigated by choice but now I am converted! My smartphone died a slow (or fast) death (while very drunk) in the pool at Songkran in Thailand three months ago and I haven’t been bothered to replace it since. Now I check emails in the morning and evening and  go via Facebook  for a stalk at the same time. I no longer scroll for updates every hour, check in or out, nor am I available for email banter on my personal mail. I am much more productive at work, and less focused on what other people are doing, more present in each moment with my friends and my thinking space is freed up for more things, like this blog!

2. Meditation and Yoga.

I used to pound the pavement training for that endurance race or spend my time screeching to techno in a high impact body attack class. Since I stopped all that and this year am expending more energy at work, I go for a few easy runs and the rest of the time am at Yoga or Pilates. NOTHING happened to my body and I did not put on 700 kilos as I imagined I would when I let all the urge to do all that ‘hard’ training go. Mind wise I am calmer and more focused. It is also a great break up of the day by going to training at lunch. I also try to meditate now before bed. Sometimes it helps but sometimes my thoughts just race around my head and it makes me feel more stressed than before I tried to sit still. But I am getting there. Slowly.

3. Learning to say no.

I used to say yes to  ALL things out of guilt. I was scheduled to the max for two months earlier. Now I say NO and I am happy about it! If I know it is a hectic week at work, I don’t try to do everything at once or see everyone after work anymore. I don’t spread myself too thin  between people and exhaust myself like I used to. I say no and try to postpone things for a week if I know it is going to be a stress or that I am not going to be able to give something  or someone my best me.

4. I have given up chasing people.

I used to have friends who I would ‘catch up’ with. I would chase them for a date for months, then ‘catch up’ then we would go back to our respective lives never to be seen or spoken to again. While this is essential in maintaining friendships when both lives are busy, there were some people that I was chasing and chasing and the love was not being returned. A phone call or a coffee with someone you want to have in your life should not be a hard thing. I have given up.

If someone wants you in their life, they will make space for you and ask you to be in it.

How have you learnt to just ‘be’ and switch off.. any advice? 

 

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